LADY BITS 101

I struggled to come up with the title of this one ladies. lol. I wanted to go for something that wasn’t too lewd or vulgar and something that was not too serious or professional at the same time. After lots of back and forth, I settled with LADY BITS. That was the best I could do, lol. Don’t judge me.

Anyway, like most of you must have guessed, today, we are talking about the external female genitalia aka your vagina

A lot of ladies don’t have the basic information about their genitals. There is also a lot of misconceptions, myths, and back and forth about the female genitalia. So, I decided to clear up a few things.

First things first, let’s talk a basic anatomy.

Did you know the external female genitalia i.e what you see when you look ‘down there’, is actually called the “vulva”. The vagina is the canal/tube that connects this external genitalia to your cervix and uterus. So technically, what most people call the vagina is the vulva.

Here is a simple image showing the parts and components of your vulva.

Image from www.plannedparenthood.org

Now, let’s clear up a few things!

It comes in different shapes and sizes…

Girls…this one right here is legittt!!! The vulva (i.e the female external genitalia) comes in different shapes and sizes. No 2 vulvas look exactly the same. Everyone’s anatomy is different. So don’t feel like something is wrong with you if you think yours looks different. Don’t let anybody make you feel like insecure because of the shape or size. Educate them😉😉

By the way, this is me assuming you know how yours looks o. No fall my hand*. If you don’t, get a small mirror, and do some looking . It is important for you to know how it looks on a normal day so when something extra is going on, you will be able to tell. So do some looking abeg. Make sure you lock the door to the room before you start o. Or else, no be me send you😂 🏃🏽‍♀️🏃🏽‍♀️

Click HERE for a more detailed guide on how to do a vagina self-exam



There is more than one hole

You…yeah you! I see you laughing or rolling your eyes there. Trust me, this is not universally known. Some people don’t know there are 3 holes down there. You read it right, 3 holes!! One for pee, one for period, one for poop. I call them the 3 Ps. Lol. The products don’t mix. The passageways are different. If they start mixing, something is wrong.

It cleans itself!


Fact! Your vagina (the canal) cleans itself! Douching, steaming, putting deodorants etc.  is not necessary at all (In Falz the bahd guy’s voice, “Ko neccestry”). It has a self cleaning mechanism. Yeah. Legit!! That’s kinda what discharges are for.  You however have to clean the vulva (you should know what part this is by now🙄). Nothing too extra. A mild soap and water should do the trick. Try to avoid using soaps with harsh chemicals and fragrances and stuff. It could mess up the balance of things down there i.e the balance of good bacteria. And messing with the balance of things could lead to even bigger problems, so just stick to simple. Other basic hygiene tips include wiping from front to back, avoiding tight panties (cotton panties are recommended), changing your pants daily or as needed, and maintaining good period hygiene.

It has a smell.

It does. It’s not smelless. Everyone’s vagina has a distinct smell. And that smell is not lavender, or roses or any other fancy smell. Unless you’re Beyonce sha. Cos that’s how I imagine Beyoncé’s own smells. But wait o, Why am I imagining the smell of Beyonce’s … shoot. Nvm🤦🏽‍♀️. Back to the point. lol. It has a smell. The issue is when the smell becomes a bad odor. Like when it smells so gross. That’s when there’s something wrong.


Different times = Different colors of discharge.


Yeah. Not everything is an STD. Depending on the time of the month and what stage of your cycle you are in, the color and texture of your discharge could vary. It could be clear, milky, sticky, or slimy. Some colors however indicate something is wrong. Yellow, green, grey, brown, or when odours or itching involved, you should investigate further. This LINK gives a quick guide on what is normal and what is not. If you’re too lazy to click the link, the chart below should also do the trick😉

Infections down there are also not always STDs. It could be as a result of an imbalance in the arrangement of things, yeast infections etc. Your best bet if you suspect something wrong is going on is to go see an health care practitioner.

Vaginal discharge color guide: Causes and when to see a doctor

It is elastic.


Yeah….well, maybe not elastic elastic. But still, elastic. I mean, Babies come out of there. It has to have some elasticity to be able to allow a baby’s head pass through. Childbirth, aging and a bunch of things could however cause the muscles down there to lose tone. That’s why you gotta learn how to do Kegel exercises early on. What are Kegels? Pretend you have to pee but there is no toilet nearby so you’re trying to hold the pee. You see what you did there??? That’s Kegels. Do it for a few seconds a couple of times a day and it would work some magic. Thank me later
Click HERE for more info on Kegels. 

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There you have it ladies, simple, basic info about your vulva and vagina! Now don’t be stingy with this info, tell your friends to tell a friend, to tell a friend!

Thank you for reading!

PS: Did you enjoy this post? If YES, subscribe to the blog to get notifications on new posts, and maybe one day you will get a notification about LADY BITS 201 😉😁

* no fall my hand = don’t disappoint me

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